Givers, Takers, Sharers

THERE are two kinds of people. You have the givers and there are the takers. Regardless of character and personality, you can break the people of the whole world down into these two broad categories.
Among the dynamic persons, there are the dynamic givers who give more than they take. Then there are the dynamic takers who take a whole lot more than they give.You have quiet givers who work like crazy for others. Then there are the quiet takers who quietly take and give a little.There are the talkative givers and the talkative takers. Shy givers and shy takers. People of every stripe, ...

Every one in abusive relationships thinks there’s only two groups of people: Givers and Takers. But there’s a third group. And once you know, understand and ’get’ the third group on a gut level, it all starts to fall into place and your relationships start to work out. The third group is Sharers. Sharers know in their mind, their heart and their soul they deserve to receive as well as give. Sharers know, over the long run, the relationship will balance out to be 50/50 give and take. Sharers have a healthy self respect and they expect their partner to treat them with respect, the same respect they give their partner. When they don’t, a Sharer leaves.
When there are two givers in a relationship, the relationship is poised for success as both partners take the time to give and to nourish each other.

Because there is more blessing in giving than receiving, I implore you to commit to being a giver for the rest of your relationship; aim to become a giver rather than a taker. Just in case you are a taker, wondering where to begin or what to give, here is a short list of inexpensive items that your partner should be sure to enjoy.

1. Foot massage or back rub No cost
2. One hour of listening ear No cost
3. Quality time No cost
4. Three little wishes No cost
5. Stroll in the park No cost
6. Setting the bath No cost
7. Little love notes No cost
8. Helping with house work No cost

Since it is better to give than to receive, no wonder, successful relationships are those where both partners are givers. Show your appreciation this Christmas by getting creative or giving something special. Remember to give according to your budget and the taste of your partner.

When it relates to showing love, analyze if you are a giver or taker. In love a giver will do what it takes to make the other person happy and not look out for their own interest. A giver will hold the door open for you, buy you dinner and go the extra mile without expecting anything in return. A giver will not steal, cheat or lie. A taker will seek out ways to make themselves happy, never be satisfied with what you do and drain you as they seek more and more from the relationship. A taker will steal, cheat and lie.
When it relates to friendship, are you a giver or taker?


In friendships a giver will take the time and get to know your likes and dislikes and be sure to try and please you. A giver will buy you gifts, help when necessary (even without asking), share and just be there for you. A taker will look for ways that you differ, continuously pick out your flaws and always have an excuse why they couldn't be there for you. A giver will give their last and a taker will take your last.

When it relates to work (secular), are you are a giver or taker?. At work, a giver will go above and beyond to make sure the corporation or business is successful. Even when the boss is not looking, they will complete their work and be courteous to the customers. A taker will feel like the company owes them something despite their work performance. A taker will leave early, take longer lunches and work with an attitude.

LOVE quota

Love. In life there are quotas for everything. For every person we meet there is a quota of love that we can give to that person. Every person we meet is initially allotted a different amount of love. Not by us but by fate.  Once that person uses up their quota there is no more that can be given. Even if you wanted to continue loving that person, as you used to, you just can not. I have experienced this, you have experienced it, and so has the rest of the world.  Because the source of love has dried out. You have already given up all that could have been given. People live their lives unconscious to this rule of life and feel that love from a single source will forever abound.

There are only so many times you are willing to risk for one person, stand up for one person, hope, trust, expect, understand, sympathize until there's no more to give. Its an unconscious effortless act of humanity which once extracted from the fountain from which it was derived is gone forever. Sometimes it just runs out. There is only so much abuse, neglect, criticism, lies, deception, a person can take before they decide that it is time to conclude that chapter. And when you close that chapter don't feel bad. .

There are those that allow people back in their life that do not deserve it. Sometimes people come into your life to teach you a lesson or to serve you company during that portion of your life. This does not mean that if they did not treat you the way you wanted to be treated or if they are  not what you are looking for in a partner anymore that you should allow them back in. Cut the ties. Cut the umbilical cord.

If it did not work out the first, second, or third time what are the chances that it will work out again? Unless you are willing to go to therapy or make a life decision to both change together ITS NOT!!!!. People don't change deep down inside unless something life altering happens to them. DON'T be fooled by the facade of change or fake promises. Eventually the veracity of their character will be revealed directly or by underhanded ways. If you continue to allow someone back into your life after they screwed you over literally and figuratively they will view you as easily replaceable. They lose respect for you and see you as a quick fix. Since they already know you and what you are all about they know how to best manipulate you and tell you what you want to hear and keep you wrapped in their web of lies. In life it pays to be strong and have the ability to walk away. Never look back.

In order to succeed in life and be HAPPY you MUST eliminate poisonous manipulative people.  Don't worry about their feelings because they usually never stop to think about yours until it hits them that its OFICIALLY over. Funny thing is that these abusers do not realize until its too late, and many times (not all) they come back in different ways ( text, email, call, etc.). The reason they return is because you brought more goodness into their life than they did to you, and they like that imbalance. They want to maintain that in order to feel control. They want to return in order to leach off of all the good qualities you have and when they take what they want they WILL leave again. They know exactly what they are doing. They know you have things they do not. These people are not stupid. Remember they belong to the category of takers not giver and want to return because they benefit from you but never stop to think that the relationship is in no way, shape, or form beneficial to you. Do not allow imbalance of LOVE and APPRECIATION in your life.

When these abusers return don' t be angry, or sad, be happy and even PROUD that this person cannot find anything better than you. OBVIOUSLY NO one can provide what you can, in the way you can, so therefore they come back to see how much they can continue to leach off of you. Cut these energy vampires with their insecurities, lack of motivation, lack of follow through, lack of character, and whatever else they lack OUT OF YOUR LIFE. Only allow people who bring good things to your life not the worthless who suck all your positive energy. Now that you are wiser use this as an opportunity to reflect is this really what you want?? Funny thing is many times they blame things on you, and do not take responsibility for their actions and later out of the blue when you have moved on and no longer even think about them they return. For more. BEWARE OF THESE LEACHES.