NEVER STOP SHINING

SHINING

you know what that is?
its not a creepy horror movie or what we usually think of it as..shining is being able to let self discovery and authenticity overcome your fears. When you overcome your fears you have gotten rid of the barriers that society sets up for us as to what we should be like based on appearance, race, and ethnicity.

Have you ever had people think you were dumb and materialistic because you dressed well? They so easily assumed you weren't deep or intellectual??

Have you ever had someone think you were a flirt because you were friendly, and fun?

Have you ever been told you were showing off because you were dancing from the deepest reaches of your heart?

Have you ever worn your hair in a funky way or have that special way of wearing make up or putting together a nice outfit that leaves others in awe?

Have you ever been created an amazing piece of artwork, or writing, sang or played an instrument that reflected your talent, ability, skills?

Have you ever had an all original beautiful idea...and yes my friends IDEAS are priceless, and have everyone guessing how you always come up with these great ideas that have this special personal touch??

or even had a special natural ability to connect your world to the reality of today..a natural longing to know what the human condition is and how economics, the environment, politics, business, and our youth all play into all this
if so ...then you've shined my friend!!
and if you have ever shined you know the pain that comes with it as well..
the pain of having a "close friend" not tell you how brightly you shine because they secretly envy and covet.... while at the same time acting differently towards you

the pain of having someone tell you to lower the intensity about something you are extremely fiery-red passionate about...
(because secretly they wish they had something they could be passionate about, since they cant feel that intensity in their heart, they want you to lower yours so they can relieve their envious ways, and feel safe in their neutral fantasy)

the pain of having someone constantly try to ruin your image by telling you, you're showing off when you are just being funny, yourself purely, and dancing from your heart..
THe brighter you shine the more passionate your haters are when it comes to bringin you down...

HATERS!!! yes I said it! HATERS!

THey wish they could do the things you could do but cant so they hate on you
spread rumors about you, try to ruin your image by making up all sorts of crazy conclusions...(that could only come from their malignant low self esteem let's not forget)
if you can relate then you know what I mean...

I experience full blown HATERation evey mothafucking day!

never stop shining, never lower the intensity or stop "showing off"
because those who ask you to or comment about how you shine wish they could have just a little bit of your shine rub off on them so they can shine like you or at least appear to be shining as bright as you are..

yes APPEAR...because at the end of the day that person or persons are not the real thing they are imitations, phonies, and coveters of something so real and so pure in its originality ..yup ORIGINALITY..

so they want to make you look bad..stupid..not intelligent...crazy...like

you have issues... because there is always that one little star that shines brighter than all the rest... shines with committed intensity!

THese are the things that have been going through my mind and heart this late of night...i had to finally get this "off my chest"haha cuz there are just way to many motherfucking bitch ass haters these days..if you please would be so kind as to excuse my language..haha

I will never downplay my abilities or strengths to make you feel better about yourself, because I have sought the strength within myself to grow and overcome the constructs placed on me by society!

I will never stop S*H*I*N*I*N*G* but thank you very much to all the haters, vocalized, as well as internal haters..

You must always thank your haters for being in the front row seat, and first in line to get a sneak preview of the beautiful work of art, journey, quest that is your life! After all they are your biggest fans**

You never know whats inside someone's HEART

Sometimes in life when you first meet someone they come across as nothing special, easily overlooked. They are the person who is too scared to pursue their goals, too scared to take a risk, to scared to try something new. They are the shy reserved ones or the ones who are scared to take a new approach that challenges the status quo. Being compassionate you befriend them. You kind of feel pity for them because they themselves do not see their full potential. Many times they are not aware of all the beautiful things they can unleash if they just change their way of thinking and take small risks. Scared of, or being ignorant to their FULL potential. They seem harmless and genuine, just needing a small little push. Needing someone to believe in them. Someone to believe that Yes they can change.

Seemingly harmless and genuine you do not feel threatened in any way by these people and do not mind opening them up to new experiences and ways of thinking. Slowly they begin to blossom. Slowly coming out of their shells and developing their own interests and ideas. They begin to be the person they have always dreamed of. They begin to unleash the potential that was lurking within the inner reaches of their heart. With this new found confidence and ability they pursue life vigorously. Soon you start to realize that this person seems different. Yes they are actively pursuing their dreams and being the person they always knew they were. But something seems very different. No longer does this person regard you in the same way they did before. It seems as if they willingly treat you differently, refer to you differently. You can not quite understand what is going on. Your strengths are perceived as weaknesses and the personal qualities that brought this person to want to be closer to you are now chastised. You can not quite figure out this behavior until it suddenly hits you that this person is competing with you. For attention, for status, for popularity. Now that they have obtained a little bit of that shine that attracted them to you they feel superior to you. That they can achieve more, that they are better than you. They criticize you, make your strengths seem like weaknesses, and look down upon you. They become fake generic friends.

SO easily they forget that that it was you whom INSPIRED them.
It was you who gave them that little push.
It was you who saw the potential in them no one else would have thought existed.
It was you who believed in them.
It was you who challenged them to challenge themselves.
They forget that if they shine it is because you taught them how.

A person may appear to be a certain way but deep down may harbor completely different desires than what meets the eye. Nothing ever is what is seems to be. In life you never know what is inside someones heart.

Soooo......have you ever thought about how others see YOU?

Many times you are striving really hard towards a goal, or to stay in sync with your values. DO you ever stop to think how others view you? Sometimes I wonder about that, how do others view me. Most people are experts at looking at OTHERS and judging. Are you as much of an expert at introspecting and coming to terms with truths about yourself that you might not like?

Sometimes your strengths might be viewed by others as weaknesses or character defects.

1. You find myself being sure of what I want or sure of what I know and others might view me as a KNOW IT ALL.
2. You might be sharing my happiness with someone about something you have triumphed or achieved and others might view that as BOASTING.
3. You might be dancing with your heart and spirit not giving a fuck about what someone else might think and others view that as SHOWING OFF.
4. You find yourself not getting all worked up about situations or conflict and others might view that as INDIFFERENCE...not caring.
   
5. You may come across as withdrawn, serious, quiet, not showing feelings. Others might think your COLD or even ARROGANT.
   
6. Maybe you like to look good as often as possible. You might be labeled SUPERFICIAL/materialistic.
7. You may feel confident, sure of yourself, independent, and decisive others might view that as ARROGANCE.
8. What others view as INDECISION. You might view as simply waiting to get the absolute best deal or option.

But do they see things how you see them. Or even try? You may think you are getting your point across but are others really seeing what is inside your heart? How many times are our actions and words misconstrued? Your real intentions transformed into fierce sources of negativity and hate?

Frankly at the end of the day you just have to be sure of what you want and what your goal is. Seek those things which you know will get you what you want. People usually only see what they want to see. Its scary to think that you are giving 100% of your best and others may only see 20%. You cannot allow this to bring you down. Stay on your path and do not allow yourself to be distracted. The road to success, enlightenment, and spirituality are usually lain with roadblocks. Others negative or misconstrued perceptions should not be a source of destruction of YOU. Do not let the essence of you be Corroded by hate.

You cannot please everyone. You cannot allow others to determine your path, or actions. Do what fills you with joy. You read that correctly???.......JOY....... If your actions, thoughts, words, opinions are not affecting anyone's life in a negative way..their comments or views are NOT important. There's so much goodness in the world, so many beautiful possibilities. Others might misc0ntrue the beautiful possibilities you bring to the world. Its your job to not allow those possibilities to be destroyed or overlooked.

Sometimes I wonder how others view me, depending on the situation you might see me as ditzy, arrogant, cold, Happy!, quiet, show-off, withdrawn, friendly, studious, Slacker, creative, logical......I just hope that the goodness that lies within my heart shines through. A fire that never dies. Never simmers. I hope others can see my strengths as shining rays of warm light and not as weaknesses or sources of hate. I cannot please everyone and was not put on this earth to please you!! I will never stop shining. Maybe you might think I do not shine lol. But I KNOW I do. I just hope that the REAL me is acknowledged in a positive way.

Signing off...

The Milky Way

Female Friendships: Survival of the Fittest in the 21st century

The dynamic between female relations is twisted. I am a female but I feel that there are codes of conduct that are socially accepted among females that I never learned. Maybe it has nothing to do with gender but with basic human instinct. The betrayal comes when the trust sets in. It is said that " el mas amigo es el que mas traiciona", which means that the person who is your greatest friend is the one who has the highest chance of betraying you ruthlessly. Thats because this great friend is the person you confide in, that person which knows your deep feelings, stance on issues, and secrets. This person knows exactly what to do to destroy you and if given the chance in the correct situation they might just do that if it will help them obtain the social status they covet. Whether they do it out of spite or simple survival of the fittest the possibility exists. This is not to say that this knowledge is applicable solely to female relationships but men do not build up tension the way females do. Females compete in a very different way than men do, its extremely INDIRECT.

Im a late bloomer. It took me a long time to finally figure out what most girsl were aware of back in HS or even Middle School. I have always done my own thing. Having the ability to be independent and self sufficient holds more worth and weight than codependency. I always viewed female relationships as faulty because men attack each other directly whereas female competition is very indirect. I caught a glimpse of this indirect female competition in Junior highschool and made the unconcious choice to stay away from it. Therefore I was never truly faced with it until mid highschool and was never able to recognize it for what it was female competition. Anyone who "competed" with me I would automatically label as a chickenhead and move right on with my life. I thought it was just a faze and that as soon as I headed to college I would never have to deal with it because people in college were more focused, mature, and knowledgeable. Little did I know that this competition is merely a simple fact of life. I guess these chickenheads take on new personalities, and forms of social interaction but at the core of their existence is the insecure, backbiting, chickenhead they truly are. Some things never change.

Female competition takes on a new form. It deals with things that are more superficial and in extreme cases it can be very deep and psychologically driven. It can be explained very scientifically with Darwins law of evolution about survival of the fittest. The fittest individual has the higher possibility of attracting the best mate, reproducing, and passing on their genes. A large percentage of the population fails to remember that we are animals first, humans second. We are driven by our survivalistic genetic composition. If in order to survive an individual feels the need to compete, deceive, and belittle another they will do just that because we are animals first and humans second. For example why do females wear make up....they do so to be more attractive and to stand out amongst the other females in order to attract the best mate and therefore survive. Wearing make up raises certain females self esteem, and makes them feel pretty, confidenct, and juvenile. All of these being traits that men find irresistibly attractive. Why might a female hate on another female for doing just that....it might be because that female feels overlooked, not as confident, low self esteem and therefore belittles and criticizes a female who has personality, or physical characteristics which she covets. Herein begins the competition. It might seem a simplistic explanation but at the human core are survivalistic instincts. Why is a female who gets alot of attention from the opposite sex feared by other females...because she has higher chances of surviving and obtaining a mate or social status. She might feel that the attractive females has one-up'd her and has greater chances of success in different areas of life. If a female fears that this female has a higher chance of obtaining male attention or the attention of a specific male she is interested in the competition begins. The same can be said of a female who has recently obtained a fine job or is very successful in her career. The logic can be applied to popularity, grades, internships, and societal approval.

The threat lies in that female competition is so indirect that much of these thought patterns are never spoken but are exposed in indirect forms. The best friend or acquaintance who is constantly criticizing you for the natural gifts which you are blessed with whether it is your shining personality, independent character, go-getter attitude, your quiet disposition, your ability to dance well, good grades, your amazing wardrobe, etc. The criticism is delivered in such a way as to seem harmless but after the fact one can not help but feel attacked. If confronted the competitor will always try to dilute the statemenent by demean it harmless, a joke, or by making themselves the victim. It can manifest itself in the form of the hypocritical friend who acts decent to your face but destroys you when you are not around by indirectly distorting the truth about your character to others. Due to the fact that this person is or was your friend there is a higher chance that other will believe the allegations made towards you and seldom question. Therefore your competitive friend can be destroying your chances of succeeding socially without you even knowing. Female competition can be detected in the indirectly looks one individual gives another when you are in their presence aka the evil eye. Or it might even take the form of excluding you from events or meeting people which the competitor feels you would win over. Another example is demeaning your intelligence and leading others to think you are stupid by distorting your comments or interpreting your actions in a malicious way. An extreme example is that of the mother who secretly envies her daughter's looks, or personal relationships. It can be of the mother who envies her daughters relationship with the father if the mother was not able to obtain a healthy relationship with the man whom they are both connected to. The mother feels that the daughter has gained an advantage, a higher status and therefore conveys this message in indirect ways. These might manifest themselves in the form of constant criticism, arguing, or even emotional distancing. These are some examples but they all lead to the same conclusion.

Whenever you are shining at your all time best there will always be someone who will want to bring you down. For some reason this behavior is acceptable amongst females. It is encouraged by the belief that being blunt is equivalent to being a bitch. It is encouraged by stupid societally accepted and enforced behaviors of conduct which imply that it is better to tell a white lie than the truth. It is not ladylike to be blunt, it is not ladylike to confront. This might not apply to all females but to any female who has had to deal with this dynamic among their female relationships these examples dont stray too far from the truth. It is usually the person you least expect who unveils malicious intentions. You never know anothers agenda but remember that top priority in everyones agenda is to survive. Survival of the fittest internally drives us all.

The power of Intuition

Intuition is a gut feeling. It is a random thought. It is a subconscious perception of the truth. It is your inner guide. It is the voice of god or whatever other deity you worship or believe in. Sometimes your intuition presents to you negative thoughts. Don't be fooled this is not you being a negative person or thinking the worst of a situation this is the truth of the matter. Not all intuitive thoughts will be positive.

Have you ever gotten a negative feeling before meeting up with someone, or during and encounter with someone?

This is your intuition speaking. These random seemingly unrelated thoughts are the keys to your destiny. You can use your intuition to change the outcome of situations. If you allow yourself to listen to it. If your gut feeling is telling you one thing but everyone else is telling you something else...listen to yourself first. There have been many times when I should have listened to my intuition. I used to think that negative thoughts could not be delivered by intuition but they can. If you get a random negative thought let it sink in a little it could be your insecurities churning or an intuitive message. Not all intuitive messages will be happy and positive. A person is no lesser a positive individual because they listen to warnings of a negative outcome. If anything you can use this warning to avoid the negative outcome and manipulate it towards a more positive ending. This should be the goal.

More to come!

Dominican Self Hate

Not only does self hate loom in the African American culture in the US it also predominates in the Dominican Republic. The Dominican Republic was inhabited by Christopher Columbus who brought with him many African slaves there to cultivate cotton, sugar cane and other natural goods. Unlike African Americans though the Dominican population was so heavily influenced by Spanish Imperialism in the Island of Hispaniola that most Dominican even charcoal black Dominicans today do not claim themselves as black. Imperialistic colonizers sought to convert the Taino populations of the DR as well as the African population into Christianity. Much of the culture was mixed therefore Dominicans today come in all different shades of Brown.

Dominican girls Luz Freiney Paulina, from left, Esther Celeste Santana, Mayelin Eloisa Valdez and Melisa Valdez, comprise the dance troupe Las Nizas. Below, Dominican author Manuel Nunez writes about the issues of 'black' and 'Dominican' as they relate to the history in his country. (Candace Barbot/Miami Herald)

Deeply rooted into the Dominican psyche was the concept of White is good Black is bad. Even though the White colonizers from Spain where the ones to destroy the original Taino tribal culture that existed there: enslaved them, tore families apart, and raped their women. When the Taino people could do no more shipped in ship loads of Africans to increase man labor and harvest crops. The Dominican population does not identify with Blackness. The Dominican population perceives Darker skin and other physically predominant Black features as bad, ugly, and lower class. About 90% of the Dominican population today has African ancestry. The DR is the only country in the entire world whose populations is mostly descendant from Africa yet fails to acknowledge its blackness.

Sensitive Nature of Black Self Definition in the DR. Society is Integrated but far from Color Blind.

So deeply brainwashed is the pop. of the DR that it is known for its predominant and flourishing hair salon businesses. Much like the African American women in the US Dominican women would do anything than to be caught dead wearing their natural "nappy hair."

Yara Matos holds her hair extensions as a stylist in the Herrera neighborhood prepares to give her the look of long, straight hair. (Candace Barbot/Miami Herald) http://www.miamiherald.com/multimedia/news/afrolatin/part2/index.html

Mariana Ramirez smiles as she sits in Daisy Gran Salon in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic. (Candace Barbot/Miami Herald)

It is normal for a Dominican females to relax their hair as early as 5 years old. This is a life long process that many do not grow out of. Even women who have "good" hair due to their prominent European descendancy relax their hair without needing to. The research and funding that goes into Dominican hair products (for black hair) is very extensive. Dominican hairstylists are even gaining wide popularity in the United States for being able to maintain healthy hair that ranges from slightly wavy to very coarse due to the many differences in backgrounds.

There is nothing wrong with maintaining healthy hair but many of the treatments that are recommended encourage damaging your hair's natural state. Dominican hairstylists are experts on converting natural curly and coarse hair into very straight sleek and shiny. There is nothing wrong with that once in a while but when will be the day when the DR accepts that it is fine to let your hair out. Instead of encouraging shiny sleek hair when will it be okay to encourage wearing your hair's natural curly state. When will it be okay in the Dominican Republic to encourage afro's, and cornrows. When will others stop looking down upon moreno's for their kinks or curly hair?

When will it be okay in the Dominican Republic to be BLACK? It has been so ingrained in Dominican culture that blackness is bad that many go as far as selecting a mate that does not have prominent black features. Those who have big noses, big lips, coarser hair, even less income. Those of prominent African roots are treated differently, even badly by the rest of the Dominican population and usually are in the lower part of the socioeconomic spectrum. This including racial slurs, and demeaning comments. Many dark Dominicans being excluded for the rest of their lives.

What will it take for this behavior and way of thinking to be transformed into one of greater acceptance? Why haven't black Dominicans in the DR revolted or spoke up for themselves? The only way to stop this is for darker skinned Dominicans to stand up for themselves as a whole, not try to assimilate themselves with the rest of the trigueno population. To let their voice be heard either through music, activism, or politics. They have to be forceful and confident. After so many years of Independence the DR still has a long way to go. A revolution must occur in the DR, but only if the morenos have the courage to stand up for themselves carve their path and encourage acceptance of their African Roots.

The Miami Herald has done a 5 part series on The Voice of Afro-Americans: Covering The D.R., Cuba, Nicaragua, and Brazil.  Here's for more information on the Dominican Black Denial.


See also:
Colourism

Dominican Hair Products

Are  Dominican Blowouts Healthy?

Theme song

"EARTH!"
"FIRE!"
"WIND!"
"WATER!"
"HEART!"

"Go Planet!"

"By your powers combined, I am Captain Planet!"

Captain Planet, he's our hero
Gonna take pollution down to zero

He's our powers magnified
And he's fighting on the planet's side

Captain Planet, he's our hero
Gonna take pollution down to zero

Gonna help him put asunder
Bad guys who like to loot and plunder

"You'll pay for this Captain Planet!"

We're the Planeteers
You can be one too
'Cause saving our planet is the thing to do!

Looting and polluting is not the way
Hear what Captain Planet has to say!

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