Crazy NYC train fight!

So recently this video came out for the Holidays about a fight on the 6 train.

You can watch it here. Be careful in these New York City Trains.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJfRb2oBhFo

Shame on the people in the car, shame on MTA and the conductor who clearly saw the woman fall to the ground and hit the side of the train, yet continued to leave the station without calling for assistance. Ambulance, police, fire dept, somebody. MADNESS, PURE MADNESS!!!

Givers, Takers, Sharers

THERE are two kinds of people. You have the givers and there are the takers. Regardless of character and personality, you can break the people of the whole world down into these two broad categories.
Among the dynamic persons, there are the dynamic givers who give more than they take. Then there are the dynamic takers who take a whole lot more than they give.You have quiet givers who work like crazy for others. Then there are the quiet takers who quietly take and give a little.There are the talkative givers and the talkative takers. Shy givers and shy takers. People of every stripe, ...

Every one in abusive relationships thinks there’s only two groups of people: Givers and Takers. But there’s a third group. And once you know, understand and ’get’ the third group on a gut level, it all starts to fall into place and your relationships start to work out. The third group is Sharers. Sharers know in their mind, their heart and their soul they deserve to receive as well as give. Sharers know, over the long run, the relationship will balance out to be 50/50 give and take. Sharers have a healthy self respect and they expect their partner to treat them with respect, the same respect they give their partner. When they don’t, a Sharer leaves.
When there are two givers in a relationship, the relationship is poised for success as both partners take the time to give and to nourish each other.

Because there is more blessing in giving than receiving, I implore you to commit to being a giver for the rest of your relationship; aim to become a giver rather than a taker. Just in case you are a taker, wondering where to begin or what to give, here is a short list of inexpensive items that your partner should be sure to enjoy.

1. Foot massage or back rub No cost
2. One hour of listening ear No cost
3. Quality time No cost
4. Three little wishes No cost
5. Stroll in the park No cost
6. Setting the bath No cost
7. Little love notes No cost
8. Helping with house work No cost

Since it is better to give than to receive, no wonder, successful relationships are those where both partners are givers. Show your appreciation this Christmas by getting creative or giving something special. Remember to give according to your budget and the taste of your partner.

When it relates to showing love, analyze if you are a giver or taker. In love a giver will do what it takes to make the other person happy and not look out for their own interest. A giver will hold the door open for you, buy you dinner and go the extra mile without expecting anything in return. A giver will not steal, cheat or lie. A taker will seek out ways to make themselves happy, never be satisfied with what you do and drain you as they seek more and more from the relationship. A taker will steal, cheat and lie.
When it relates to friendship, are you a giver or taker?


In friendships a giver will take the time and get to know your likes and dislikes and be sure to try and please you. A giver will buy you gifts, help when necessary (even without asking), share and just be there for you. A taker will look for ways that you differ, continuously pick out your flaws and always have an excuse why they couldn't be there for you. A giver will give their last and a taker will take your last.

When it relates to work (secular), are you are a giver or taker?. At work, a giver will go above and beyond to make sure the corporation or business is successful. Even when the boss is not looking, they will complete their work and be courteous to the customers. A taker will feel like the company owes them something despite their work performance. A taker will leave early, take longer lunches and work with an attitude.

Bitch

Here is something that I have noticed in the last few positions I have held, in regards to women in positions of power, and that is this: that a woman, when the 'boss', is expected to make the time, and take the effort to foster deep interpersonal relationships with her staff, and if she does not actively do this, she is percieved as a bitch, and her employees will actively try to undermine her authority because of it. However, the whole dynamic changes when the 'boss' is a man: then, employees are the ones making the effort to create a relationship with him, and do not expect him to be making that same effort towards them. Instead, they make a concerted effort to make him notice them, and to win his favour.

I think that society looks and behaves differently toward men and women who hold power. When men make mistakes, they make mistakes, and when women make them, they get fired. And, I think that women are our own worst enemies when it comes to dealing with other women in power. Women undermine other women all the time, when it comes to workplace interaction. I listen, sometimes, to how women talk about other women, and I am apalled. We don't cheer each other on, but instead we run around behind each other's backs, picking away on whatever we can to cut that woman down...*to cut her back down to our own level*. And all it takes for that kind of behaviour to start is for a woman to be the boss, and not be absolutely perfect, every single day.
And I think that that sort of behaviour makes women who do wield power a little leery, because one false step and the next thing you know, everyone is commenting on the size of your ass and the cut of your hair, and feeling like they have the right to bring you down, and to judge you on anything they perceive as a flaw, even if it has nothing to do with the arena of professional life.

LOVE quota

Love. In life there are quotas for everything. For every person we meet there is a quota of love that we can give to that person. Every person we meet is initially allotted a different amount of love. Not by us but by fate.  Once that person uses up their quota there is no more that can be given. Even if you wanted to continue loving that person, as you used to, you just can not. I have experienced this, you have experienced it, and so has the rest of the world.  Because the source of love has dried out. You have already given up all that could have been given. People live their lives unconscious to this rule of life and feel that love from a single source will forever abound.

There are only so many times you are willing to risk for one person, stand up for one person, hope, trust, expect, understand, sympathize until there's no more to give. Its an unconscious effortless act of humanity which once extracted from the fountain from which it was derived is gone forever. Sometimes it just runs out. There is only so much abuse, neglect, criticism, lies, deception, a person can take before they decide that it is time to conclude that chapter. And when you close that chapter don't feel bad. .

There are those that allow people back in their life that do not deserve it. Sometimes people come into your life to teach you a lesson or to serve you company during that portion of your life. This does not mean that if they did not treat you the way you wanted to be treated or if they are  not what you are looking for in a partner anymore that you should allow them back in. Cut the ties. Cut the umbilical cord.

If it did not work out the first, second, or third time what are the chances that it will work out again? Unless you are willing to go to therapy or make a life decision to both change together ITS NOT!!!!. People don't change deep down inside unless something life altering happens to them. DON'T be fooled by the facade of change or fake promises. Eventually the veracity of their character will be revealed directly or by underhanded ways. If you continue to allow someone back into your life after they screwed you over literally and figuratively they will view you as easily replaceable. They lose respect for you and see you as a quick fix. Since they already know you and what you are all about they know how to best manipulate you and tell you what you want to hear and keep you wrapped in their web of lies. In life it pays to be strong and have the ability to walk away. Never look back.

In order to succeed in life and be HAPPY you MUST eliminate poisonous manipulative people.  Don't worry about their feelings because they usually never stop to think about yours until it hits them that its OFICIALLY over. Funny thing is that these abusers do not realize until its too late, and many times (not all) they come back in different ways ( text, email, call, etc.). The reason they return is because you brought more goodness into their life than they did to you, and they like that imbalance. They want to maintain that in order to feel control. They want to return in order to leach off of all the good qualities you have and when they take what they want they WILL leave again. They know exactly what they are doing. They know you have things they do not. These people are not stupid. Remember they belong to the category of takers not giver and want to return because they benefit from you but never stop to think that the relationship is in no way, shape, or form beneficial to you. Do not allow imbalance of LOVE and APPRECIATION in your life.

When these abusers return don' t be angry, or sad, be happy and even PROUD that this person cannot find anything better than you. OBVIOUSLY NO one can provide what you can, in the way you can, so therefore they come back to see how much they can continue to leach off of you. Cut these energy vampires with their insecurities, lack of motivation, lack of follow through, lack of character, and whatever else they lack OUT OF YOUR LIFE. Only allow people who bring good things to your life not the worthless who suck all your positive energy. Now that you are wiser use this as an opportunity to reflect is this really what you want?? Funny thing is many times they blame things on you, and do not take responsibility for their actions and later out of the blue when you have moved on and no longer even think about them they return. For more. BEWARE OF THESE LEACHES.

Jealousy

“In my opinion jealousy is a side-effect of a mindset that’s rooted in scarcity. Jealousy is the emotion resulting from the notion that another person’s success or happiness somehow diminishes your own. If you look at the world from the lens of abundance instead of scarcity, it’s very difficult to become jealous.”- Steve Pavlina.

Another person's success does not mark your own lack of success. Another person's success is merely an indicator of what life has in store for them. Every one has their own path but not everyone has the right to denigrate anothers'.  Every person has the ability to change their life around by coming to terms with their soul, their heart, their needs and wants and CHANGING. We all have the ability to change but some do not have the motivation of others. Your own lack of motivation does not give you the right to demean another's well of motivation.

“The thermometer of success is merely the jealousy of the malcontents.”
Salvador Dali

"The above quote by Salvador Dali really captures what jealousy is all about. People sometimes look at successful people and become jealous of their success. Jealousy obfuscates the mind, in turn hindering our ability to think clearly and reasonably. Thinking is one of the special gifts that makes us human. When jealousy kicks in, we lose that thinking quality. We thus become less human. No wonder jealousy is referred to as the green-eyed monster."

In this case successful people meaning people who are taking steps towards their dreams. People who are actively working hard, and actively putting in the effort to get where they want to get. Success does not readily mark corporate success, success in my opinion is living your ideal or working hard towards you ideal and being happy knowing that your only one step closer, OR as close as you're going to get. The ideal is a notion that can change as one receives new information during the course of life therefore the ideal is never realized but one can always improve one's situation, life, relationships as the new definition of ideal is improved. In my opinion, SUCCESS= conscious improvement, hard work, natural talents/skills, passion, connections, and risk taking. All depend on what you want to achieve of course. I BELIEVE that in life one can achieve and obtain anything one wants as long as one is willing to put in the hard work and effort to build upon natural/ or learned talents/skills. The sky is the limit.  I live my life by that mentality. Always have. It's been difficult at times but I have always been able to rise even when I have fallen through the deepest emotional canyons. For this reason one should never let others unconscious jealousy and tattered ego's become roadblocks.

If you want something bad enough then you can do it.

Rules

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anwyay. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness. people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may be never enough. Give your best anyway. For you, in the end, it is between you and yourself. It never was between you and them anyway.

Crab Theory

Interested in studying the Crab Theory: To move up, do u necessarily need to bring other people down?

Is it a minority thing that we cannot see others succeed, or come up to the same level we have reached? How does jealousy, selfishness and goals to achieve within an under priviledged group of people affect or has effect in this theory? umh...Something I've been meaning to understand for a while, but there's not too much to it, just the reality matter...

In essence, the crab theory refers to the idea that you never need to put a top on a barrel of crabs to prevent escape, because they’re all too busy pulling at each other’s legs and climbing on each other’s backs to think of working together and pushing each other out. It is a mentality that if I cannot have it neither can you!!

This term is broadly associated with short-sighted, non-constructive thinking rather than a unified, long-term, constructive mentality. It is also often used colloquially in reference to individuals or communities attempting to "escape" a so-called "underprivileged life", but kept from doing so by others attempting to ride upon their coat-tails or those who simply resent their success. It first was spread a among the Deaf community but can be applied to any other unprivileged group.

It describes a desperate lust to pull other people down, denigrating them rather than letting them get ahead or pursue their dreams. It is an unwillingness to allow someone to get out of dire or bad life situations, often being foiled by friends and family members who keep sucking them back in. This trait can strike at several levels of life, like in office environments, particularly on promotion. It is a reflection of the famous saying “we all like to see our friends get ahead, but not too far ahead.”

Why when people of the same group see others of their own group succeeding pushing ahead through barriers are they most apt to bring them down through many devious underhanded ways without showing restraint??

A well known joke in Canada goes as follows:

Q. Why don't you need to cover a Canadian Lobster pot?
A. Because the other Lobsters will drag down anyone that tries to climb out.

And isn't that right!! haha.

This is done through vicious gossip (back-stabbing), spreading false rumors (slander), sending hateful e-mails, etc. It’s based on a real-life phenomenon: when crabs are captured and tossed into a bucket, if one crab tries to escape by crawling up the inside of the bucket, the other crabs pull it back down. It’s probably instinctive, a panic response on their part.

So no crabs ever escape. This behavior in crabs is widely held to be a myth, but has been observed. When successful leaders of any background complain about the lack of support and downright hostility they encounter from members of their own communities, that’s the crab theory….

Career Interests and Ability to Socialize

There are many different things that I am passionate about. Therefore I can see myself going through many different careers through out my lifetime. Although I do believe that you must get a degree in one of those interests in order to be recognized by society. I do not think that because I get a degree in one subject area that that is what i will be doing for the rest of my life but I do think it will affect my future decisions. I now I want to create change maybe through policy, advocating, campaigning, teaching, informing but I have not figured out how to link all of those things into one. Or better said what my niche is in that process which suits my interests and personality. I do know that to get ahead in life you must be able to be flexible and get along well with all different types of people. The better you are at this the more successful you will be.

In a society where the majority are whites you must be able to get along well with whites too. Getting along with whites does not make you an Uncle Tom. Some people are so uneducated they think that an educated person who can mix and mingle with members of the majority have somehow lost a sense of their ethnic identity. Unless you are adopting racist views and help racists and prejudiced people perpetuate their views then you are not a sellout. Being able to present your opinions to people who are in positions higher than yourself and getting them approved does not make you more white. It makes you smart because then you can push your ideas forward and get them signed and approved. No one will sign and approve your ideas unless you have a title or highly developed skills.